Few things are more painful than finding out someone believed a lie or lies about us receiving only one side of the story. If we’ve lived any length of time, most of us have probably experienced it. And damn. It’s painful!
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told things, (even in church), about another person, when I didn’t even know them. I’m a firm believer in giving EVERYONE a fair chance and forming my own opinion. I think thats the JUST thing to do.
The lies or half truths that have been told about a person can be excruciatingly painful, especially when believed. My husband and I had a lady stand up in a church while they were taking prayer requests and tell a horrendous lie about our family in the “form of a prayer request,” that many believed. That sort of thing isn’t easily overcome. I wouldn’t have known except that a lady that knew our character that attended church there and knew these were lies spoken, called me immediately to inform me. (I was a leader in our church, so many knew us and knew our character). I was literally stunned. But quite honestly, that was the first of a conglomeration of things done to our family by her own hand. There were a series of lies told that brought untold pain to my husband and I. Ironically, the very things spoken about us were true about HER, so the things she spoke were twisted. (This is quite common when accusations are spewed. Take note when this is happening to determine whether or not what is spoken about you or someone else, may be true of them)? Because we were already having problems with her, I’d asked those that knew her, if this was a common occurrence with her? Consistently and across the board, it was. This barely scratches the surface of what we suffered at her hands. The events that happened after this were so preposterous, so outlandish, most would not believe the details of what we went through. Let’s just say… there was a grandiose need prevalent to control situations and people, and this is how she perpetrated her evil deeds. Though we could have sued her for defamation of character, we chose to remain quiet.
I think the most painful part of these incidents were the people that were sucked into believing her lies, and who treated us differently because of it. It was an awkward situation for many reasons, so I felt it best to remain silent over the myriad of incidents. Let’s just say, we reap what we sow, and we’ve silently observed the reaping again and again. Her character was quickly exposed.
We’ve experienced other painful incidents in which people made judgments about us having only ONE SIDE of the story. Had they heard our side and rendition of what happened, it would have drastically altered their conclusions.
And here’s the biggest point I want to make here. When someone shares something about you or someone else, think twice! If you know the person accusations and judgments are being spewed about, if at all possible attempt to talk to the other person or persons, just to level the playing field. Get their side of the story also so you have a better chance of seeing the situation with a balanced perspective. It’s what I call “giving a person the benefit of the doubt.” They truly deserve a fair shake, to eliminate compounded pain. Because this my friends,… is also truly painful. Just knowing people have not valued and respected us ENOUGH to find out our side of the story. Every person in the story deserves to be heard, rather than making an assumption and judgment from a jilted perspective.
If this has given you perspective on similar situations you have dealt with, or one in which you’ve been the painful recipient of, please take a moment to leave me a comment! I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences!
