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When this epiphany came, it hit me like a ton of bricks! I finally KNEW I was over being INAUTHENTIC! I knew I was over painting pictures that were not true to life. I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt when it was time to shed the mask and BE REAL…to be TRUE TO MYSELF. To stop telling everyone what they wanted to hear. To stop people pleasing and truly start truly living. Has everyone accepted this new-found me that happened over a decade ago? For the most part, …Yes. The moral majority of people do appreciate those who are authentic, and tell it like it is. THE WORLD NEEDS REAL! I’ve been thanked multiple times for being vulnerable and authentic with others! After all, it liberates them to do the same!
Have you ever been guilty of telling someone what they want(ed) to hear? I know I have. If we were to do a survey on this, I’m positive, if we were to be honest, almost ALL of us have! Pardon the expression, but most of us have had those times we just need to GET A MONKEY OFF OF OUR BACKS. (We temporarily appease someone because we know if we don’t, all hell is gonna break loose and the dung is gonna hit the fan! Rather than get pelted in the cross fire, we rattle off a few words as smooth as ice to pacify the person and situation). We are “TEMPORARILY” off their hook. Whew!
I had someone recently confess to me that they had to give a monkey the boot. I told her, everyone, and I mean everyone, has done that at one time or another! I also told her that there will come a time when she will feel the need to start being true to herself. There’s just something in our guts that doesn’t feel right, when we aren’t true to ourselves. We know good and well what we need to say at the time, but in an effort to protect ourselves from opposition or wrath, we back down.
There are just days we don’t wanna “deal!” And that’s ALL of us. It’s a “NOT TODAY SATAN” day! We’re not in the mood for a blow up. Maybe we’re emotionally spent and just plain tired. Whatever the case, when we’re in a relationship with anyone that’s easily triggered, it’s a thing. Tip-toeing through their tulips, with land minds….a-NO! Right or wrong, we choose the easy way out. But quite honestly, we are doing THEM and US a huge disservice when we tell them what we know they want to hear, vice telling them what they NEED to hear. Not a single solitary soul is helped in life, always being told what they WANT to hear. We ALL need to be challenged to be better human beings. Even the dung slingers!
I know I personally want friends and relationships with those who will be honest with me. We ALL need to be challenged from time to time. It’s healthy to be given different perspectives than our own. Just the same, we ALL have blind spots! And we need to CHALLENGE OTHERS AND START BEING TRUE TO OURSELVES! I know it’s easier said than done because taking flack from those who don’t want to hear the truth, is no easy feat. BUT, at least we can rest in knowing we aren’t enabling others to continue in destructive behaviors. AND, we can finally make peace with ourselves that we are no longer living a lie.
You see, being TRUE TO OURSELVES is one of the GREATEST gifts we’ll ever give to ourselves and others. It is in this place we will finally have PEACE and be STRONGER FOR IT!